It's surprisingly easy to virtually kill your eBay business, if
you're not careful.
Yes, I know, you can probably start over again from scratch
without it costing you anything, but do you really want to?
So, if you want your business to end up dead in the water, here
are some simple ways to do it.
1. Lie about an item
Say it works fine when it sometimes doesn't work. Say it's in
perfect condition when it has a scratch. Your customers will
hate you!
2. Mail your item whenever you feel like it
Make sure to leave your customers hanging around, wondering when
their item is going to turn up. This makes sure they buy from
someone else next time.
3. Let items end anytime
Few people will be around to care about your auction if it ends
in the middle of the night. Why go to the trouble of working out
whether auctions will end at a good time?
4. Don't bother with email
Customers are just time wasters anyway. eBay businesses are
supposed to run themselves! Never give informed responses to
questions about your item.
5. Sell rubbish
Really, it's just eBay. You can just sell any old tat from the
market for a 200% profit. Let quality be someone else's concern
- I mean, really, what do they expect for that price?
6. Refuse to give discounts
You know what your items cost, you know what your profit margin
is going to be, and you're not going to negotiate. Remember that
giving customers special deals might make them feel good and
come back to you again.
7. Make your listings ugly
As many colors, flashing lights and animations as possible will
really give those customers a headache. Write as much in
CAPITALS!!!! as you can. Preferably big, red capitals. Be sure
to use the fonts Impact and Comic Sans. For an extra special
touch, see if you can figure out a way to add some music.
8. Don't take photos
It's such trouble, after all. If buyers are picky enough to
actually want to see items before they bid on them, then screw
'em, that's what I say.
9. Write short descriptions
Be as brief as possible, and use lots of mysterious
abbreviations. This obviously makes you look very cool. You can
even just write the title again in the description box. Think of
the effort you'll save!
10. Use reserve auctions
Now, this is a fairly controversial final choice, but it really
is one of the best ways to scare away your customers. They'll
see 'reserve not yet met', and click that 'back' button before
you know it. Luckily, they can always bid in a normal auction
for the item somewhere else.
Well, there you are. How to close your eBay business in 10 easy
steps.
I know you're not guilty of any of those.
Are you???
About the author:
Brian McGregor is an eBay and internet entrepreneur. He recently
created the 'eBay Master Class' for eBay sellers. For your free
copy, please go to
http://www.work
winners.com/ebm-request.htm
